new hampshire report: f*&k applebee's...

the deezy's nuptuals were tremendous. the bride and groom were beaming and weepy, booze flowed freely, beers were shot gunned, boneless chicken wings were consumed, the comfort inn and suites were dominated, frat talks were had, polka music was heard, brats and special beans were eaten, and things were generally free and wonderful in the hampshire. until i went for a post-wedding cocktail and was refused service at the pizzeria uno across from the hotel. if that wasn't brutal enough we were then refused serevice at the next door applebee's. two chain restaurants in one night? real low point. they said we looked "stumbly and red eyed" (i blame cousin timmy and president pierce) when we walked over from the hotel. they also aksed "you're all from n.y. right?" before kicking us out. malcolm x and a-dub, what gives? they hate n.y. up there eh? not so free really? maybe suit and tie don't fly up there. could have used you both for some local thunder. anway, in the words of the great al goldstein, applebee's and uno can both go f*&k themselves. anyway other that that the wedding was tremendous and i would like to thank barry beck, andre the giant, goldberg, ned yost, cousin timmy, president pierce and all the others who were living free and peeing every 15 minutes. also would like to thank a-game, who dealt with one of the frattiest weddings ever and even shot gunned a beer in the bathroom of the comfort inn. observe and respect.