thanks to jimmy page....

jimmy page sent this o.k. go video to me and even thought we posted it a while back (a-game and little birdie have been big fans since cinnamon lips came out a few years ago), it makes me so happy to see it again that i wanted to share. i also wanted to thank guitar legend jimmy page, who is the only reader coming up with any content of late. what happened to the upper east side report? sadly we only had only one jersey report (i can now get photos up). i'd even take the rangers/islanders report. what about a hipster report or an art attack? it's been so long since we've had one of those. so anyway, this is for you jimmy, our newest loyal reader and our only content provider:

west indies cricket gear...

which do you like? richards t seems to be the early favorite...

hot pitching matchup tonite...

SEATTLE, Aug. 30 - The Mariners rookie pitcher Felix Hernandez is all of 19 years old, and something is missing. With only five big-league outings, Hernandez is set to start Wednesday night against the Yankees. He will be opposed by the former Mariners icon Randy Johnson. The house will be full and the hope placed on Hernandez by this avid baseball community will be boundless.

So where is his nervousness? Where is his anxiety? When will his immaturity surface? So far, he is cool. His baby face is unpretentious and his smile effortless. He is so-what casual.

"They are like any other team," said Hernandez, spinning clichés beyond his years. "I just try to do my job."

i also love the burger...

A word of advice. Never use the phrase "just a burger" with Nancy Silverton. I did and was promptly challenged on every aspect of burger-making, starting with where to buy the meat, what grind, size of patty, how to cook it, what to serve with it, what pickle, what bun, what ketchup, what mayonnaise, what mustard, what cheese, how thick to slice the avocado, what bacon, what smoke on the bacon, what occasion.

The co-founder of Campanile restaurant and La Brea Bakery may be famous for more sophisticated food, but to her, the burger is one of the great American dishes, and exactly the thing that she likes to give friends for an end-of-summer barbecue. To prove it, she immediately threw a party.

I was the guest taking notes.

When we arrived midday, the fire was going in her barbecue pit. It was made from almond wood, lighted at 8 that morning to give it time to form its own charcoal. The hamburger toppings were already prepared, the buns sliced. The world famous chef was in her element. "I've always loved hamburgers," she cried, "back to the day I ate them at Denny's well done."

Over the years, the way that she made burgers changed in step with her taste in restaurants. "If I like a burger, I always ask how they make it," she said. She learned about meat by asking what they ground at the Union Square Café in New York, and at Zuni in San Francisco. From Taylor's Refreshers in St. Helena, she learned the importance of the right bun.

It has to be a classic, soft hamburger bun, she said, not sourdough, rustic roll or, perish the thought, pita bread. The important thing is the proportion of burger to bun. "It should be 50-50," she said, just right for absorbing juice and toppings.

it is unusual for our players to struggle for three or four on the trot ...

i think i missed something here. the aussies are now down 2-1 in the ashes? england could win for the first time in forever? what the f? i can't keep track of this f'ing sport, but it is damned exciting. i hope that reknowned aussie spin bowler shande warne's words can fire up his squad. i also love the nose block. cricket has everything. after i post this i am going to look for some west indies cricket gear on the web. work is slow today.



Shane Warne believes it will take all of Australia's experience and character to turn it around in the final Ashes Test at The Oval against England.

Australia have not lost an Ashes series since 1989 but are 2-1 down with one to play, which starts on 8 September.

The 35-year-old spinner, writing in The Times newspaper, said: "Too many of our guys are underperforming.

"It'll be a case of going back to basics and getting those right. I'm backing them to come good."

After winning the first Test at Lord's, Australia were beaten by England at Edgbaston and Trent Bridge, defeats Warne blamed on the tourist's inconsistency both with bat and ball.

can't wait...

NEW YORK -- Charlize Theron is giving the critically acclaimed but ratings-starved "Arrested Development" a boost of star power.

The Oscar-winning actress will guest star on the Fox show for a five episode arc, the network announced Tuesday. She will portray Rita, a British woman whom Michael (Jason Bateman) dates.

small burr-like teeth?

A controversial device, which its inventor claims clamps itself to a rapist's penis forcing him to seek medical treatment and be revealed to the police, will be launched by a South African woman on Wednesday.

The "Rapex" device is inserted into the vagina by a woman who feels she is at risk of rape, and if she is attacked, small burr-like teeth will attach themselves to the tip of the rapist's erect penis, explained inventor Sonette Ehlers.

As he withdraws and becomes flaccid, it is only possible to remove the device by surgery, Ehlers said ahead of a launch and demonstration at Kleinmond near Cape Town.

the always tricky "lefty from luxemborg...

It was supposed to be a hip ad slogan that would draw in Generation Xers - and those that yearn to be - for the tournament's entire run.

It turned out to be the 2005 U.S. Open poster boy's ironic epitaph.

Where is Andy Roddick's mojo indeed?

Shockingly dissected by an inexperienced lefthander from Luxembourg in the setting that had become his personal stage - nighttime at Arthur Ashe Stadium - Roddick was eliminated last night from the 2005 U.S. Open.

In the first round.

yahoo photos is racist...

the brothers are looters while the honkies just "find" stuff. i also like how this guy got a bucket full of beer. nice work by him. meanwhile that white bread is going to be mighty soggy.


A looter carries a bucket of beer out of a grocery store in New Orleans on Tuesday, Aug. 30, 2005, as floodwaters continue to rise in New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina made landfall on Monday. (AP Photo/Dave Martin)\



Two residents wade through chest-deep water after finding bread and soda from a local grocery store after Hurricane Katrina came through the area in New Orleans, Louisiana.(AFP/Getty Images/Chris Graythen)

i'd love to see this guy lose to central florida tomorrow night..

it's steve spurrier, but i'll always use niners photos whenever possible

so much syrup...

spent the weekend in vermont with a-game and her cousin in burlington and then hitting up a wedding in manchester. got real drunk in burlington and even enjoyed an elicit sando or two with anna's cousin's hubby who was very excited to hit the bars and chat it up with another fella while the ladies and "baby anna" (named after a-game) went home. the wedding was lovely, fredeeky was particularly charming and hilarious and made lots of new friends, who i'll never see again. i did, however, shoot a brutal 110 on saturday morning. nothng funny about that. still hurts my brain just to think about.

for andre....

happy to have your boy back?



thought reggie could appreciate this one as well.

mac fu....

talk about your percolation levels. off the charts i would expect. andre is leading the charge to buster's garage to watch the canes/seminoles. unfortunately fredeeky will be working, but he will certainly be wearing his canes t and rooting hard for jersey's greg olsen and brooklyn's leon williams (even though he believes that willie williams will take his job). in the meantime here's devin hester, the most exciting player in college football.

holy ghost enema?

here's an insane lady televangelist, who says that we all need a holy ghost enema. for serious. then she starts screaming and (i think) passes out at the end. disturbing, yet hilarious.

not sure about this one...

Factotum n. a man who performs many jobs. So reads the white-on-black text at the beginning of this movie adaptation of the first novel in Charles Bukowski's Factotum trilogy, in a sense a self-parody as it looks at an author struggling for work, acceptance, success and personal fulfilment.

The main character goes by the name of Henry (Hank) Chinaski, a slow moving loner played by Matt Dillon who drifts from one job to another, aided usually by alcohol related dismissal. He also lurches from one woman to another, though one face keeps turning up on his list of conquests, that of Jan (Lili Taylor), with whom he strikes not only an obviously sexual connection but an emotional one too.

Chinaski gets through jobs quicker than you or I would hot dinners - in fact the only other thing he does quickly is drink beer. Or spirits. For this film doesn't just smell of alcohol, it reeks of it. You can't wash it out of your soul for hours afterwards.

100 years ago today...

truly one of the most intriguing figures in the history of sport. i have a theory that in order to get 4,000 major league hits one needs to be a little bit psycho. cobb and pete rose are the only two to achieve this number and both are insane.



Cobb joined the Tigers on Aug. 30, 1905, as a wispy-haired 18-year-old call-up from the Class C Augusta Tourists. Malcolm Bingay later sang the Peach's praises as the original Iffy the Dopester. "Nobody ever knew what he would do -- anywhere or at any time," marveled Iffy.

Unfortunately for Cobb's reputation, that sense of uncertainty extended to situations outside the ballpark. In one of Cobb's shameful episodes, he once left his flabbergasted guests inside his Detroit home and drove to a local meat market to confront a merchant who had sold his wife 20 cents' worth of spoiled fish for that evening's dinner.

More unsavory than the fish in question was Cobb's method of conflict resolution. Cobb, like most Southern boys of the time, had grown up around firearms, and often carried a small revolver with him. After extracting an apology from the butcher at gunpoint, he got into a fistfight with his husky assistant. Soon police joined in the melee. The Tigers star was tossed in jail, fined $50, and missed much of the rest of the season because of a fractured thumb.

Brilliant, boorish and to a certain extent misunderstood, Cobb remains one of the most compelling sports figures ever. A century after he broke into the major leagues, historians and biographers are still trying to sort out this complex and often self-contradictory character.

the sfc report...

SAN FRANCISCO - Commuters are used to traffic backups during the rush-hour commute on the Golden Gate Bridge. But even this had to throw some of them for a loop: An ostrich got loose from a minivan Monday and started roaming around near the toll plaza on the bridge.

Ron Love, the owner of Love Farms, was transporting two of the odd-looking birds in the back of his van. Love was stopped in traffic when he suddenly accelerated, jolting one of the ostriches, who smashed through the back window of the van and got loose on the bridge.

The ostrich began running around on the bridge, stopping traffic for about eight minutes before police were able to move it out of traffic.

"It was quite an adventure," Love said. "Strange things always seem to happen with ostriches. I guess this proves it."

it's all about f*&%ing...

LONDON, (AFP) - British tourists have left the residents of one charming Austrian village effing and blinding by constantly stealing the signs for their oddly-named village.

While British visitors are finding it hilarious, the residents of F---ing are failing to see the funny side, The Sunday Telegraph newspaper reported.

Only one kind of crimimal ever stalks the sleepy 32-house village near Salzburg on the German border -- cheeky British tourists armed with a sense of humour and a screwdriver.

"We will not stand for the F---ing signs being removed," the officer told the broadsheet.

"It may be very amusing for you British, but F---ing is simply F---ing to us. What is this big F---ing joke? It is puerile."

Local guide Andreas Behmueller said it was only the British that had a fixation with F---ing.

"The Germans all want to see the Mozart house in Salzburg," he explained.

"Every American seems to care only about 'The Sound of Music' (the 1965 film shot around Salzburg). The occasional Japanese wants to see Hitler's birthplace in Braunau.

"But for the British, it's all about F---ing."

love ron popeil...

Five decades after slicing and dicing his way into television history, the pitchman who gave America the Chop-O-Matic, the Veg-O-Matic, Mr. Microphone and the Pocket Fisherman has sold something else: his company.

"But wait, there's more!" Ronco Corp. founder Ron Popeil said Monday. "This means I have the time to invent more products!"

Popeil, who made his first television commercial in the mid-1950s to sell a garden-hose-powered spray gun, has sold the business that made him a multimillionaire to a holding company, Fi-Tek VII Inc., for $55 million.

In two easy payments.

"It's $40 million now and $15 million later," said the 70-year-old Popeil, whose polished pitches made him a pop-culture icon. Comedian Dan Aykroyd parodied Popeil in a "Saturday Night Live" skit hawking the imaginary Bass-O-Matic fish pulverizer. And the Smithsonian Institution includes a Veg-O-Matic II in its collection.

this is delightfully suspect...

Jason Giambi's bat has come alive again.

Giambi hit two homers and drove in four runs as the New York Yankees rallied from a four-run deficit and beat the Seattle Mariners 7-4 Monday night for their fifth straight win.

In his last two games, Giambi has four homers and 11 RBIs. In his 19 previous games, Giambi had no homers and four RBIs.

Last Thursday, he had a cortisone shot in his left elbow.

``The shot has helped me a lot,'' Giambi said.

for reggie...

jimmy page checks in with a travel tip...

Hanging out in the Philippines with nothing to do, you could aways attend a Horse Fight.

smoke 'em if you got 'em...

Scientists have successfully converted human embryonic stem cells into lung cells, taking a first step towards building human lungs for transplantation.

According to research to be published in the journal Tissue Engineering, the team from Imperial College London, took human embryonic stem cells and 'directed' them to convert into the type of cells needed for gas exchange in the lung, known as mature small airway epithelium.

Dame Professor Julia Polak, from Imperial College London, who led the research team, says: "This is a very exciting development, and could be a huge step towards being able to build human lungs for transplantation or to repair lungs severely damaged by incurable diseases such as cancer."

a site devoted to men who wear socks and sandals...

enjoy

hope this isn't serious...

On Monday, under mostly cloudy skies, Eli Manning's summer camp training came to an end. It is very likely that his preseason is over as well. There is even a trace of doubt about whether he will be ready for the Giants' regular-season opener Sept. 11.

Manning spent Monday's practice watching from the sideline, a forlorn expression on his face. Wearing his No. 10 jersey, he was no more active than the dozens of fans also watching practice who also wore the newly popular No. 10 Giants jersey. Tim Hasselbeck took Manning's place quarterbacking the first-team offense.

Manning's sprained right elbow is serious enough that he will be sidelined for the next week, including Friday's preseason game against the Jets. He may be out longer, taking a two-game layoff into the Giants' opener against Arizona, if he is even ready to play then.

another great prank....

from the same guy who gave us the classic turnpike prank. someone trys to rip him off on ebay for his power book so he screws them over with hilarious results.

love the college football...

In case you don't know the legend, here's a recap: In one of his more brilliant gambits, Fry ordered the walls of the old visiting locker room at Kinnick painted pink. A psychology major, Iowa's football coach reasoned that the soothing color might placate some of the savage beasts that had pounded on the Hawkeyes for much of the 1970s.

And, heck, if that didn't work, it would at least give them something to think about - and complain about - rather than focus on the game. The old fox never missed a trick.

Over the years, Big Ten coaches tried little ways to counter Fry's stratagem. Most of them didn't work. A few did. In 1989, Illinois assistants wore pink hats on the sidelines at Iowa City, and the Illini won, 31-7. In 1996, Gary Barnett had some students paint Northwestern's home locker room pink the week they practiced for the Iowa game. The Wildcats won at Kinnick for the first time in 25 years.

But the most infamous detractor was Schembechler. Michigan's coach repeatedly grumbled about Kinnick's guest room. He went so far as to order his assistants to paper the walls before he'd dare let his Wolverines enter. Out of sight, out of mind.

This room would give Schembechler a heart attack. It's Bo-proofed, a gaudy Crayola explosion from the patterns on the carpet - pink speckled with brown - to the tiles on the ceiling above. Genius. Madness. Dusty Rose.

"You have to realize," Meyer said with a grin, "how many pink colors I looked at for this project."

She settled on a shade - "Innocence" - roughly the same as a Hi-Liter. To call it bright would be an understatement. When Hawkeye running back Marcus Schnoor first saw it during a team tour last week, he almost had to shield his eyes.

And then Schnoor tells you he's color-blind.

"I could tell it was different," he said. "I thought it was hilarious."

yahoo photos does it again...

An older woman smokes a marijuana joint at Hempfest in Seattle, Washington. More than 150,000 people were expected to attend Hempfest at Seattle's Myrtle Edwards Park on Seattle's waterfront 21-22 August 2004. The event is billed as the world's largest drug-policy reform rally.(AFP/Getty Images/Ron Wurzer)

too much cricket lately?

Shane Warne has given a guarantee that Australia will raise their game for the fourth Ashes Test at Trent Bridge.

Having lost by two runs at Edgbaston, they only just hung on for a draw in the last game at Old Trafford.

"Talk is cheap but the boys are ready to go and I expect some special performances from them in these next two games.

"For a few of the guys it's a test of character. They would like to put things right," Warne commented.

a classic...

Argentine football hero Diego Maradona has said he is unrepentant about using his fist in a controversial goal against England in the 1986 World Cup.

Speaking on his TV show, Maradona said the intervention, which he nicknamed "The Hand of God", was justified.

"The truth is that I don't for a second regret scoring that goal with my hand," he said on the programme.

The footballer apparently defended his goal as his response to Britain's claim to the Falkland islands. He said he wanted to let Argentines and the whole world know the truth about a key moment in football history.

Maradona scored the goal by punching the ball into the net during a jump as goalkeeper Peter Shilton leapt into the air towards the ball.

nice job by this guy....

Many pitchers tried and failed to replace Wright and the other injured starters. As the rotation has settled down, the Yankees have crept up in the standings. With a 7-0 victory over the Toronto Blue Jays at Yankee Stadium last night, Wright helped his team pull even in the American League wild-card race.

The Yankees have a 68-55 record, identical to that of the Oakland Athletics, who did not play last night. The Yankees are three and a half games behind the Boston Red Sox, who were also idle, in the A.L. East.

"We control our own destiny," Torre said. "That's really all you want. We have our future in our hands. If we don't get the job done, it means we weren't good enough."

new feature...

in respect to the great influence that al goldstein had in my upbringing, i present a new feature which is totally ripped off from al's great program, "midnight blue". it's called "go f yourself". in between escort commercials and interviews with porn starts, al used to take someone or something that wronged him and tell them to go f themselves, cause he had a t.v. show and he could do that if he wanted. i remember that eastern airlines and david's cookies were two of his favorite targets back in the day and neither is still in business so maybe al was onto something.



today's episode is about the porto rico importing co. it's a place on bleeker that sells coffee and always cops an attitude at me like i have never tried coffee before. on saturday, this particular lady was dying to tell me about "acidic twang". are you kidding me? are we talking about coffee? f you. then she gets on me about how fine i want my coffee ground and how it's going to seep through the paper. i do this every day and i have never had that problem. tried to be funny about it and tell them that always give me grief about this, but she was all disgusted with how i wanted my coffee. you work for me right? am i missing something? just give me my coffee already. i hate you. getting coffee should be an errand that should not give me such tsuris. (that's for you al.) you people just make coffee. i'll admit your product is good, but you are not rocket scientists over there. so porto rico importing comapny, you annoying bastards, go f yourselves.

thanks to reggie for this one...

JOHANNESBURG, South Africa - Hundreds of looters battled police all weekend at the site of a beer train wreck in violence that left one woman dead, South African police said on Monday as they kept a heavy guard on the remaining alcohol.

The train carrying 180,000 crates of beer from South African Breweries derailed on Friday night near Waterval Boven, 124 miles east of Johannesburg, Superintendent Izak van Zyl said.

By Saturday morning, police were battling up to 200 people from the nearby township trying to make off with crates of beer.

hate the little league world series...

this kid looks sort of like a 60 year old meth addicted woman.



Westbrook, Maine starting pitcher Nick Finocchiaro throws against Vista, California Sunday, Aug. 21, 2005 in Little League World Series tournament action in South Williamsport, Pa.. West beat New England 7-3.(AP Photo/Gene J. Puskar)

he's always been a class act...

love that the car was stolen. perfect.



Former National Football League running back Lawrence Phillips was arrested on suspicion of attempted murder Sunday after he allegedly drove a stolen car into a throng of boys with whom he had just played pickup football at Exposition Park in Los Angeles, police said.

Phillips, who has a decade-long history of arrests for violence and traffic violations, apparently was angered when he couldn't find his belongings minutes after the game ended and accused the youths of stealing from him, according to the mother of one of the victims.

None of the victims' injuries were life-threatening, police said.

Phillips' alleged behavior Sunday added to his long string of brushes with the law, including at least five arrests for allegedly assaulting women. He was wanted in San Diego on felony charges stemming from two alleged attacks this month on a girlfriend. In one incident, he allegedly choked her into unconsciousness, authorities said.

cricket report...

England's players will assemble in Nottingham on Monday to begin their preparations for the fourth Ashes Test.

The home side have named an unchanged squad, with none of the 12 allowed to play for their counties at the weekend.

With the series level at 1-1, England know that defeat at Trent Bridge would end their hopes of regaining the Ashes.

Australia, who warmed up with a draw against Northamptonshire, must decide whether to stick with out-of-form fast bowler Jason Gillespie on Thursday.

Mike Kasprowicz is vying for the third pace berth, while the uncapped Shaun Tait staked his claim with two wickets against Northants.

England narrowly failed to claim the wicket they needed to go 2-1 up in the series at Old Trafford as Brett Lee and Glenn McGrath held on to secure a draw for Australia.

nice...

While we seem to think we have seen this stunt before, it's still a very attention getting advertising tactic. To promote HBO's Sopranos, BBDO, we're told, placed life-like arms hanging out of a few cabs. New or old, we still think it's a great piece of advertising.

graffiti from pompeii...

I.2.20 (Bar/Brothel of Innulus and Papilio); 3932: Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!

I.2.23 (peristyle of the Tavern of Verecundus); 3951: Restitutus says: “Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates”.

porn makes you blind...

IT'S true. Pornography can make you blind. Look at a smutty picture and, according to research by Steven Most, of Yale University, and his colleagues, you will suffer from a temporary condition known as emotion-induced blindness.

Dr Most made this discovery while studying the rubbernecking effect (when people slow down to stare at a car accident). Rubbernecking represents a serious lapse of attention to the road, but he wondered if the initial reaction to such gory scenes could cause smaller lapses.

The answer is, it does. What he found was that when people look at gory images—and also erotic ones—they fail to process what they see immediately afterwards. This period of blindness lasts between two-tenths and eight-tenths of a second. That is long enough for a driver transfixed by an erotic advert on a billboard to cause an accident.

andre, i beg you to get this one...

it's the only way we'll ever figure out what the f is going on in this sport

solidfying his place as fredeeky's favorite football player...

Oakland Raiders receiver Randy Moss admits he has used marijuana since entering the NFL seven years ago and still smokes it "every blue moon."

Oakland Raiders receiver Randy Moss added to a long list of transgressions during his seven-year NFL career by admitting to past involvement with marijuana and saying he still uses the substance "every blue moon" and "every once in a while."

The NFL fined Moss $10,000 last year after he pretended to moon fans in Green Bay. He upset Minnesota teammates when he left the field with two seconds left during a regular-season loss to Washington. The Vikings traded him to Oakland in the offseason.

Moss warned young viewers against following his example concerning marijuana. "I don't want that to get across," he said.

Other incidents involving Moss ranged from squirting an official with a water bottle (1999) to abusing corporate sponsors on a team bus (2001) to bumping a traffic control officer with his car (2002).

this is just what the n.h.l. needs...

Yutaka Fukufuji, who played with the Japan's national ice hockey team three times, displays his Los Angeles Kings jersey during a news conference in Tokyo Thursday, Aug. 18, 2005. The Tokyo-born goalie, 22, reported Japanese media that he and the Kings of the National Hockey League agreed to a two-year entry level contract earlier this month. Six-foot-1 and 170 pounds Fukufuji was selected by the Kings 238th overall in the 2004 NHL Entry Draft.