this guy is going to need a new liver...

he's trying to go to a thousand bars in 2005. here's how he's doing.

a blow by blow of everybody's favorite 80's video....

this is some incredible commentary

from andre....

tiger woods hitting balls in dubai
(where he gets paid a cool million just to show up)

VALENCIA, Venezuela - The most important man in Venezuelan baseball is a stooped 69-year-old with a peg leg, a bald pate and a penchant for aphorisms, which he delivers in a thick Hungarian accent.
But if Andres Reiner is more Yoda than Yogi, that's not all he is.
''He's a genius,'' said author Milton Jamail, who is writing a book on the Houston Astros scout and visionary.
''He is,'' Minnesota Twins scout José Leon concedes, ``the pioneer.''
And in one house high in the Venezuelan Andes, Reiner is considered nothing less than a deity, a man entrusted with the vision and power to alter the future.
''He changed my whole life,'' said the Minnesota Twins' Johan Santana, who came to Reiner as a lead-footed outfielder and left as a pitcher who would go on to win a Cy Young Award. ``He was the one that made it happen.''

i will not make a special sauce joke...

When a veteran cop bit into his dinner from a Bronx McDonald's, he realized he was given a decidedly un-Happy Meal - his Big Mac was stuffed with shards of glass.
As the K-9 unit cop was rushed to the hospital with cuts to his mouth and throat and a broken tooth, a cop-hating fast-food cook was arrested, police said yesterday.
Hours later, a sting operation was cooked up to catch the culprit, sources said. As a marked police car used the McDonald's drive-through, an undercover cop inside the restaurant saw Albert Garcia, 18, spit in his sandwich, the sources said.
Garcia was arrested and later confessed to planting the glass after deciding he "wanted to hurt someone" that day, the sources said.

cause i love this story...

NEW DELHI (AFP) - The king of the Himalayan nation of Bhutan, which outlawed tobacco sales last month, says he plans to keep on smoking but is trying to light up less.
The king declined to tell reporters how many cigarettes he puffed daily.
"I don't want to tell you," he said when asked, according to The Asian Age newspaper.
"But with four wives, I better stop smoking," he added.

dusting eh?

MISHAWAKA — Stirring from unconsciousness in his crumpled Honda sedan Thursday, a 17-year-old Wakarusa boy treated onlookers to what might be the understatement of the year.
"We're here," he murmured.
The teen and his 17-year-old female companion made a spectacular and scary entrance to a McKinley Avenue shopping center shortly before 3 p.m. when, according to police reports, their car flew across four lanes of traffic, clipped one parked car, then struck another with enough force to send it through the front window and wall of a cellular phone dealership.
The cause of the crash? The young driver admitted that he had been "dusting" -- a slang term for inhaling the compressed air and propellant from a canned product used for dusting computer keyboards and other electronics, according to police.

big up yourselves...

a good day on the blizzy. nice work by all and i think we should all go out and get blotto tonite. cool? cool.

what do you think? cream or clear?

no nhl = ahl...

The Wolf Pack embark on a two week road stint starting Wednesday in Norfolk, with a record of 30-11-1-2 and 63 points, good for second place in the Atlantic Division, and overall. The club still holds the best home record in the league at 21-3-0-1, and will put their 9-8-1-1 road record to the test in six games on the road in 10 days. The team is still tops in penalty killing, with an 89.80% and rank fifth on the powerplay with a 19.5% success rate.

On the power of back-to-back shutouts, and more than a period of shutout hockey on Saturday, goaltender Steve Valiquette owns the best goals against average in the league at 1.57, with Jason LaBarbera number two at 1.90. Jeff Hamilton is riding a nine game point-scoring streak, dating back to December 27. He has 14 points. Layne Ulmer has
notched at least one assist in his last four games (6 total). Lawence Nycholat is tied for fourth among AHL defensemen with 28 points (5-23). Remeber their names because you will hear from them all in the NHL!

nice job by this guy...

Swaziland's King Mswati III has chosen a 17-year-old girl to be his 13th wife at a traditional ceremony.

His last bride - a teenage beauty queen who dropped out of school to become a princess - was chosen four months ago.

for k-dog....

back to our usually scheduled programing....

just a momentary break in the hilarity....

It is something that draws an easy laugh, especially from journalists: a campaign condemning America's most beloved cartoon sponge.

But James Dobson's high-profile jabs against Nickelodeon's monster hit SpongeBob SquarePants are no laughing matter. They are, instead, a textbook example of how powerful evangelical conservatives send galvanizing messages to their faithful that sail over the heads of those who aren't supposed to get it.

just so you know....

a-game is commenting from the bahamas. that kind of dedication may earn her a fredeeky t-shirt.

reggie has been coming up with gems all week...

also i will give you your fredeeky t-shirt tonite

A Slovak man trapped in his car under an avalanche freed himself by drinking 60 bottles of beer and urinating on the snow to melt it.

Rescue teams found Richard Kral drunk and staggering along a mountain path four days after his Audi car was buried in the Slovak Tatra mountains.

and even a high life hipster report to brighten the mood...

my head hurts so bad today i can't really even think about rock music,
much less hip rock music. that said, there are very few things that
make me happier than the packers winning, cute brunettes, and cheap beer but anything Pavement related is one of them. needless to say, after months of speculation i was really excited to find this gem on pitchfork today.
anyway, for those of you not familiar with the joos, go pick up American Water and i'll fill you in on their story someday. this is a hot lineup - if they could only get Ibold out of the Great Jones Diner long enough to play bass...

and finally some physical comedy....

it's hard to convey pratfall hilarity with a photo, but this is what i came up with (afv has the carppiest web site ever -- sorry a game, but i got a couple saved on the dvr is that makes you feel any better)

for barry...

by popular request....

http://technojunkie.org/berniec/ferrell_switch.html

so wrong, yet so right....

i had this up by itself, but then thought it would be better to just link to it. i did love it though.

you won't see these guys in atlantic city...

these are photos from the new jersey division of gaming's "exclusion list"

a new famous fred:



this guy is a capo in the Genovese Crime family.



committed two instances of swindling and cheating at casino gaming

you may now call me freddy gorgeous...

Joseph Massino

Vincent "Vinny Gorgeous" Basciano (oh my god he's gorgeous)


NEW YORK (AP) - Imprisoned Mafia don Joseph Massino secretly recorded his successor plotting the assassination of a federal prosecutor, becoming the first known head of a New York Mafia family to turn government informant, sources familiar with the case said Thursday.

An indictment unsealed Thursday in federal court in Brooklyn alleges that acting Bonanno family head Vincent "Vinny Gorgeous" Basciano planned the killing of a top mob prosecutor in meetings with someone described as a "high-ranking member" of his crime family.

andre, this was our corner back in the day...

not exactly the spot, but close.

A 28-year-old actress and playwright was shot to death on the Lower East Side early yesterday after she and her companions were surprised by two young men trying to rob them, the police and her fiancé said.
The shooting occurred near the corner of Clinton and Rivington Streets.

brutal week this week...

it's freezing outside and it seems as if throughout the city, morale is at an all time low. reggie, whose niners took a poo all over themselves this season, needed a little pick me up so here it is. today is the day that i will put anything up here that makes my readers feel a little better. just e mail me or drop a comment and i will make it happen for you.

classic....

from one of bill simmons' readers:

Bill, my nemisis. Remember Vietnam? You know, tiny country, only known for one quasi-victory, then for the most part faded back in to oblivion? Remember they were dominated by the French (as homoerotic as that sounds), then eeked out a win over the US after spending hundreds of years in the way back seat to Europe and the U.S.? See the analogy I am trying to make here, Bill? You see, the Yankees are the United States ... they have the most money, they have the biggest weapons, and they, for the most part, never lose. People love to hate the U.S., just as they love to hate the Yankees, mostly because people wish they were born in the U.S., and people wish they were born to fathers who knew enough to root for a winning team, and not for a bunch of choke artists that have not won a series in their lifetime. Every once in a while, a nobody team like the Red Sox, like Vietnam to the U.S., will come along and remind the U.S. that while certainly dominant, they are not unbeatable. And then what happens? Vietnam, like the BoSox parties for a while, gets drunk, loses the face of their team to the Mets, and, in the words of the great Tyson, fades back in to Bolivia. Meanwhile, people will keep hating the Yanks, will keep hating on the U.S., but its all good, cause now all Vietnam does is make shoes for NIKE. Love you.
--Chief Macho, NY, NY

thanks again reggie...

this was sort of awesome

this looks hilarious...

but i can't turn the sound up in here. someone check it out and let me know. it's some weather man's first day on the job and it turns out to be a debacle.

i loved this for some reason...

put some of these flyers up in the bathroom at work.

(thanks to thighswideshut.org -- one of fredeeky's favorites)

thanks to reggie for this little gem...

OTTAWA (AP) -- An ardent hockey fan who died this week used his obituary to denounce the NHL lockout.

Archie Bennitz, 84, instructed his son to criticize NHL commissioner Gary Bettman and union leader Bob Goodenow in his death notice.

Bennitz called Bettman and Goodenow "skunks for denying him the pleasure of watching the NHL on TV this year," the obituary in the Ottawa Citizen read. Bennitz also urged Bettman to step aside in favor of Wayne Gretzky.

this whole thing is an unbelievable debacle...

Starkly put, Baghdad is not under control, either by the Iraqi interim government or the American military.

Instead, daily life here has become a deadly lottery, a place so fraught with danger that one senior American military officer acknowledged at a briefing last month that nowhere in the area assigned to his troops could be considered safe.

i'd sort of love to see this happen...

Knick President Isiah Thomas raised the possibility yesterday of Allan Houston retiring if he's unable to get healthy this season.

"I think Allan has to make that decision himself in terms of retiring," Thomas said. "Only the player can answer that. It would be a good question to ask him. As an organization, we'll continue to support him and help him overcome his injuries."

on this day in 1991....

scott Norwood missed a last-second 47-yard field goal that gave the giants a victory in Super Bowl XXV. the kick was his longest of the year, and farther than he had ever made on grass. just a great football memory for the young fredeeky. those were the days.

cause a-game and k-dog are going to the cockfights in bali....

OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) - A state senator has a plan for saving Oklahoma's gamefowl industry now that cockfighters are legally prohibited from pitting birds fitted with razor-like spurs.

State Sen. Frank Shurden, a longtime defender of cockfighting, is suggesting that roosters be given little boxing gloves so they can fight without bloodshed. The proposal is in a bill the Democrat has introduced for the legislative session that begins Feb. 7.

snap mac perfect....

good point miami spice, here's your darrell porter with the specs for old times sake.

it's been a while since we had any hippies up here...

oy! gevalt! why are you such a noodnik? enough with the mishegoss, come join the gansah mishpucheh on the upper west side already. such a tsimmis...

A 45-year-old man is believed to have become the last Jew in Afghanistan after the death of the caretaker of the only functioning synagogue in Kabul.

turns out that he and the other jew in afganistan didn't even like each other:

His Jewish neighbour, Zebulon Simentov, lived with Mr Levin in the synagogue.
The death of the man believed to be his only co-religionist does not seem to be a source of grievance for Mr Simentov.
"He was a very bad man who tried to get me killed," he told the Associated Press news agency, "and now I am the Jew here, I am the boss."

every year chastity awareness week sneaks right up on me...

Times have changed, but the Pennsylvania State Legislature has not. In 1999, the Pennsylvania State Legislature attempted to address the challenge of unintended pregnancy in our state. Did they promote comprehensive sex education, insurance coverage for birth control, or emergency contraception for rape survivors? No. They created "Chastity Awareness Week."

fredeeky's dad was a big fan of phillip johnson...

Often considered the dean of American architects, Mr. Johnson was known less for his individual buildings than for the sheer force of his presence on the architectural scene, which he served as a combination godfather, gadfly, scholar, patron, critic, curator and cheerleader. His 90th birthday, in July 1996, was marked by symposiums, lectures, an outpouring of essays in his honor and back-to-back dinners at two venerable New York institutions he had played a major role in creating: the Museum of Modern Art, whose department of architecture and design he joined in 1930, and the Four Seasons Restaurant, which he designed as part of the Seagram Building in 1958.

HERE'S A TOUR OF HIS FAMOUS GLASS HOUSE

80's baseball card explosion, catchers edition...

honorable mention

(i know i left gary carter off the list. it's cause he's a douche wagon.)

i ran into andre's dad running in central park and snapped a photo of him...